Dear Milan aka Mr. Bear,
On February 22nd you entered this world on a cold Friday morning. We named you Milan, which has now been replaced by Mr. Bear, Bug, Sweet Cherub, Milly, and the list goes on. I remember I stared at your for a good two hours in disbelief that I was holding my firstborn child, the most gorgeous baby boy I’ve ever laid my eyes on. Even though I was in excruciating pain for the last 24 hours, your perfect round little face took all the pain away (only for a little bit once the hospital drugs wore off).
It’s been 6 months since the day you were born. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t sit there and thank god for my sweet baby boy. My 6-month-old, who’s been sleeping through the night since he was 3 weeks old. My beautiful boy who is rarely fussy & is always in good spirits (unless Massi and Mama sing in the jungle, for some reason it makes you cry).
Sometimes I sit and wonder who you will become. I get scared when I think about the future and this crazy world that we live in. I know you’re going to get older and will have to make your own decisions. My job is to make sure you make the best decisions. It’s terrifying, because I realize I can’t always be there by your side, but I hope that what I teach you resonates with you.
You will have good days, bad days, sad days, and some of the best days of your life. I promise you I will be there every step of the way. But when I’m not beside you, I pray that you can make the best decisions. You will make mistakes, but it’s up to you to learn from them and move on. Always remember, everyone makes mistakes.
Never give up. Even if you feel like the world is on your shoulders, keep on moving. Don’t settle for failure. If you start something, stick to it and keep on moving. Your Naniji is a prime example of someone who faced adversity but stuck through all of the hard times. She is the perfect person to go to when you feel lost or stuck. Always remember Mama will help you as best she can, but it’s up to you to create the life that you want.
Be kind. Treat people with respect & please don’t bully. Always be compassionate to everyone you meet, because we don’t know what battles people around us are facing. Be kind to your elders, and try to understand that they came from a different generation than you did. Grandparents are some of the most important people you will ever have in your life. Cherish them, and always make sure to take time out of your life to spend time with them. You have the best grandparents a boy could ever ask for.
Don’t get succumbed to peer pressure. I know it’s hard because you want to be cool and fit in, but always follow your heart. Your mind will tell you one thing, but your heart you must follow. I promise I will never judge, but guide you in the right direction. Never be afraid to tell your Dad & me your issues, because we are the ones who will give you the best answers to your problems without judgment.
Treat girls and women with respect. Treat them how you would treat your Mama. Which I hope is with love, respect, and admiration. Open doors pull out chairs, be that chivalrous man that I’m going to teach you to be. But also don’t allow a woman to walk all over you. Be able to stick up for yourself in a sophisticated manner. One day maybe you’ll want to get married and have children of your own. Perhaps you don’t ever want to get married or have children. Whatever decision you make, I will always support you.
Your dad is the best man I’ve ever known. I hope you become the kind, compassionate, hardworking, funny, and sophisticated man your father is. He is my best friend, and I hope he becomes your best friend one day too. Also, I hope you get his incredible wit, cuz even though mama is funny; your dada takes the cake on the humor.
Your siblings and cousins are going to be your greatest blessings. Cherish them just like I cherish mine. They’re going to be your lifelong friends and biggest supporters. You’re going to fight, but you’re going to make up. Get into some trouble & have the best childhood memories that you’ll keep in your heart forever. One day Mama will tell you all the crazy things she did with her siblings and cousins, but not just yet (maybe when you’re 30 haha.)
Laugh. Laugh so much your stomach hurts. Laugh until you cry, and always find humor in everything. Your mama’s favorite thing to do is laugh, but I’m sure you’re going to know this as the years go by. Don’t take life too seriously; life is too short for that. Dance like no one’s watching, be silly, and live life to the fullest.
When I look at you, I see a curious little boy whose going to become even more curious as the years go by. I want to protect my little boy forever but I know that’s impossible. Always make the right decisions, be kind, follow your heart, and remember Mama’s got you for life.
I love you
Love Mama.